I’ve got all her merch, and I sleep with her every night. I’m in love! I’m happier the way I am now than I ever was with some slut. Trust me, you’re never going to be as satisfied with a woman as you will with your own hands.” He respawned and continued playing, reshifting his focus back to the game. I tried to think of an argument but I really couldn’t, so I let it drop.
